WEDDINGS

Girls are so weird. We sit around and day dream about getting married, dating, and plan our future out, and obsess over everything. Boys, on the other hand, could care less about who they marry, when, why, how, etc. It's pretty funny, because I now have experience on this subject. I was being a "match-maker", and setting up these two people [lol]. I made a chart about everything that had to do with a wedding: Pictures, food, proposal, place, invitations, budget, etc. The girl filled everything out in a jiffy, and then we gave it to the boy. He was so stubborn. Maybe it was just because he thought we were freaks, but he took forever to even look at it, and when he did, he just said,"I agree with everything." So disappointing.

So why is it that girls care about their future and boys don't? I really don't know; it beats me. I think it's so funny to plan everything out, and have everything set up and ready! But boys on the other hand want nothing to do with it. It's hilarious.

When I was in...6th grade I think, my dad told me the terrible news that my uncle was going to be getting married. I was horrified. I just could not believe it. He was my favorite uncle, and I couldn't believe that he was betraying me like this! So after I was horrified, I became so angry! And when I become angry I start planning, mostly revenge. My older sister, who was equally horrified, decided to be my evil accomplice, and we began to plan. It was classic. Two pre-teens planning revenge on a 40-year-old man. When we learned that he and his fiancée were coming to visit, we decided that was the perfect time to launch our evilness...

That spring René and his wife Michel came, and we were ready. Before they arrived I made a special effort to be transported to my Grandmother's house were they were staying so that I could sabotage their room. I stole all the hangers, put random stuff down the covers of their bed, taped the blinds so that I would have a peephole from the outside, and left notes in all of the drawers of all the dressers and night stands.

On the day of their arrival my sister and I had planned out that I was going to dress up as Edna Mode with this afro wig and 100-year-old glasses. I had super tight, short stretch pants, and gave my self a fake mole, and stuffed my butt with pillows. It was pretty scary. My sister wanted me to practice for when my uncle came, so she bribed me to go to all my neighbors houses and say,"I"m an oooooold grannyyyyy." It was totally weird. I can't believe I actually did it. *sigh* Anyways, when my uncle came I totally chickened out on the Edna Mode thing, be we had lots of other plans; he invited us to his wedding that fall - big mistake. Unfortunately, I was unable to attend that historically phenomenal event, but I did send my evil accomplice to carry out my devilish plans of horror. She decorated their car, and tied cans behind it, put whipping cream under the door handles, and other things that I'm not totally aware of. But it was funny. My uncle has never looked at me the same since...haha. He's just better not do that at MY wedding...